OK, So Here's The Deal...

A Marine Major, Running Fool, and All-Around Smart-Ass.

Monday, September 12, 2005

God, I Wish I Was Kidding

Need more proof I live in Spotsyltucky; the back-woods-banjo center of the Hickiverse?

This was on the back page of the Region section of the local Sunday paper.



This was the caption (again, I'm NOT kidding!):

'Fatty McNasty' (right) waits in the corner of the ring for his competitor, the 'Confederate Warrior' during a match Thursday night at the Fredericksburg Agricultural Fair. They're part of the entertainment wrestling group that trains in Louisa.

My Top Ten Comments:

1. Holy McShit.
2. That's three, count them THREE sets of tits on one man.
3. I don't think 'Fatty McNasty' was "waiting in the corner". I think Fatty was trying to desperately locate some much needed McOxygen.
4. Did they really have to point out the "(right)" as though we would be unable to determine which one of these two was dubbed "Fatty McNasty"?
5. Confederate Warrior. Yep, ain't no tangle around these parts without a Civil War reference.
6. Fredericksburg Agricultural Fair? Is there any other kind of fair other than "agricultural"?
7. There is something on Fatty's arm. I don't know what it is. I don't want to know. Maybe a ribbon to remind him to eat his helping of babies after the show.
8. In the paper next to this picture was the headline to the article: Fair: Organizers consider emphasizing livestock events. I think they just did.
9. You think it's bad looking at this, the Confederate Warrior had to sink his arms into that huge bucket of shit.
10. For the love all that is good in this world would someone help me get the hell out of this cartoon of a region?

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9 Comments:

  • At 6:22 PM, Blogger Killjoy said…

    I can't believe this didn't get any comments. Maybe everyone is still speechless.

     
  • At 6:27 PM, Blogger Chris said…

    Jason, That is freaking hillarious. I was having a bad day and gave me a chuckle. If you ever want to get away I have two spare rooms.

     
  • At 7:35 PM, Blogger Ghostrider said…

    Wow ummm is there a way for me to back away slowly and run like ive never ran before ? All I can muster is "ummmmm".

     
  • At 12:24 PM, Blogger a.maria said…

    ew.

    just..... ew.

     
  • At 1:04 PM, Blogger Viper said…

    Killjoy,

    I KNOW!!! Some posts crack me up, even if I wrote it. This was one of them.

    Eh, who knows.

    Chris, glad you enjoyed it. It was too good to pass on.

    Ghost, welcome to my existence.

    a.maria, I could probably get you a date. I have to assume that Fatty McNasty is willing to travel if you want to cook up a cubic butt-ton of food.

     
  • At 5:09 PM, Anonymous Allison said…

    This is Ryan's gf again. He told me to comment this to this story. Check it out.
    http://www.livejournal.com/users/farblefumble/43305.html

     
  • At 5:13 PM, Blogger Viper said…

    Betting on remote controlled cars is bad, but I think that Fatty McNasty has got it beat.

    Never the less, this IS sad.

    But thanks for the mention.

     
  • At 5:31 AM, Anonymous Stephanie said…

    lol I actually know that pile of yuck..(unfortunately related) lol what you wrote was so funny that we have been passing it around to other family members and roflol! I have lived in stafford, louisa, etc.. although not anymore. Everything you wrote was so true. We have all been having a great time with this. Did you know that fatty made an appearance on the Jerry Springer show as a crossdresser? That thing was wearing a dress and kissed a man!lol lol keep up the great work!

     
  • At 3:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I hope he's still wrestling!! He's my most favorite off all time!!

     

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