OK, So Here's The Deal...

A Marine Major, Running Fool, and All-Around Smart-Ass.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

What A Dumbass

I say let the team take care of it with a blitz.

Fan: I dumped mom's ashes on field

PHILADELPHIA, Pennsylvania (AP) -- A man arrested for running onto the field during the Philadelphia Eagles' game against the Green Bay Packers on Sunday told police he was spreading his late mother's ashes.

Christopher Noteboom, 44, of Tempe, Arizona, ran onto the field holding a plastic bag, leaving a cloud of fine powder behind.

As he reached the 30-yard line, he dropped to his knees, made the sign of the cross and laid down on his stomach. Security personnel reached him moments later and he offered no resistance as he was escorted from the field.

Noteboom, a native of Doylestown, said his mother died of emphysema in January 2005, shortly before the Eagles' Super Bowl appearance.

"She never cared for any other team except the Eagles," Noteboom told WPVI-TV after he was released from custody Monday.

"I know that the last handful of ashes I had are laying on the field, and will never be taken away. She'll always be part of Lincoln Financial Field and of the Eagles."

Noteboom, a bar owner in Arizona, was charged with defiant trespass. He has a hearing scheduled for December 27.

"It's bizarre, but we have a zero tolerance for people who run on the field," Police Inspector William Colarulo said. "We especially have a zero tolerance for people who run onto the field and dump an unknown substance in a stadium full of people."

(I love that last line)

Eagles spokeswoman Bonnie Grant said the team has declined requests to spread ashes on the field.

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7 Comments:

  • At 4:18 PM, Blogger Killjoy said…

    If I wanted to read stories from "News of the Weird" I'd go read "News of the Weird."

    *Yawn*

     
  • At 4:46 PM, Blogger Viper said…

    Not so bored that you will update your own site, are ya, Red?

     
  • At 5:29 PM, Blogger O! said…

    I agree with Killjoy. I think she's brilliant.

    And by the way, I didn't bother to spread your character's ashes because by the time the ghetto chipmunks were done with your drugged, already-mangled body, there was nothing left but a stream of vomited Gu.

    Affectionately,
    Hermione

     
  • At 5:42 PM, Blogger Viper said…

    Hey you people, I already have a wife so I don't need more public humiliation. But thanks for applying.

    I've GOT to read that story, if only to stop the continuing and increasingly violent demise of my character.

     
  • At 7:02 PM, Blogger O! said…

    Demise? Why would I kill you off? Then I couldn't torture you anymore?

    Just because you are currently mangled and missing, it doesn't mean I won't find you.

    I WILL FIND YOU.

     
  • At 4:25 AM, Blogger Killjoy said…

    There, I updated my site.

     
  • At 9:58 AM, Blogger Viper said…

    O!: if I'm missing, how do you know I'm mangled?

    Killjoy: gee, thanks for gracing us with your writing. I'm on my knees thanking the blogging gods for such lavish gifts.

     

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