Sir,

In red on your home page you state the following: I'm heading out on vacation to Seattle and camping in Wyoming. I'll be back in three weeks so if you want to rob my house , now the times to do it (Let me add a period in here for you, Chris) .

I make the following observation on that. You cannot "Rob" a house, a house is not human. You "burglarize" a house. You rob a person with either Fear or Force. You burglarize a building by entering a building with or without force with the intention of committing a felony. Anyhow I hope you enjoyed your vacation, I could not pass up this opportunity to be a smart ass. I feel you would not respect me if I did not correct the biggest legal blunder known to people who watch too many cop shows on TV. Also take this opportunity to educate Alex and Stephanie so they may grow up knowing the proper terminology.

I await with great anticipation your come back email.

(He asked for it)

From me:

What if the person is unconscious? No fear or force. So is that robbing them? I would argue it was burglarizing because they are as passive and aware as a house.

And what about kissing my ass? Not literally, but figuratively. Would that violate the definition of kissing since it is physical contact with the lips?

We won’t get into “bite me.”