President Bush May Send Up To 5 Marines For French Assistance
This was lifted from DragonLady but was too perfect not to repost here.
President Bush has authorized the Joint Chiefs to begin drawing up a battle plan to pull France's ass out of the fire again. Facing an apparent overwhelming force of up to 400 pissed off teenagers Mr. Bush doubts France's ability to hold off the little piss ants. "Hell, if the last two world wars are any indication, I would expect France to surrender any day now", said Bush.
Joint Chiefs head, Gen. Peter Pace, warned the President that it might be necessary to send up to 5 Marines to get things under control. The general admitted that 5 Marines may be overkill but he wanted to get this thing under control within 24 hours of arriving on scene. He stated he was having a hard time finding even one Marine to help those ungrateful bastards out for a third time but thought that he could persuade a few Women Marines to do the job before they went on pregnancy leave.
President Bush asked Gen. Pace to get our Marines out of there as soon as possible after order was restored. He also reminded Gen. Pace to make sure the Marines did not take soap, razors, or deodorant with them. The least they stand out the better
President Bush has authorized the Joint Chiefs to begin drawing up a battle plan to pull France's ass out of the fire again. Facing an apparent overwhelming force of up to 400 pissed off teenagers Mr. Bush doubts France's ability to hold off the little piss ants. "Hell, if the last two world wars are any indication, I would expect France to surrender any day now", said Bush.
Joint Chiefs head, Gen. Peter Pace, warned the President that it might be necessary to send up to 5 Marines to get things under control. The general admitted that 5 Marines may be overkill but he wanted to get this thing under control within 24 hours of arriving on scene. He stated he was having a hard time finding even one Marine to help those ungrateful bastards out for a third time but thought that he could persuade a few Women Marines to do the job before they went on pregnancy leave.
President Bush asked Gen. Pace to get our Marines out of there as soon as possible after order was restored. He also reminded Gen. Pace to make sure the Marines did not take soap, razors, or deodorant with them. The least they stand out the better
posted by Viper @ 11/12/2005
6 Comments:
At 9:33 AM,
DragonLady said…
Thanks for the link! :-)
And thank you for your service!
At 11:05 AM,
Viper said…
I couldn't pass it up.
Did you write it yourself?
And thanks for yours, Air Force DragonLady.
At 6:46 PM,
DragonLady said…
Wish I could take credit, but I got it in an email.
At 9:35 PM,
Anonymous said…
Well, we stick or noses everywhere else they don't belong so why not?
If we all are against France now I guess we should send back that pussy ass statue of "liberty" huh?
At 4:33 AM,
Viper said…
Jen,
We tried, but they thought she was holding a club and surrendered.
(luv ya, Cuz)
At 5:09 AM,
Anonymous said…
Captain/Major,
You have to undrstand the Fench mentality:
If your a French politician you surrender quickly and go have a glass of wine.
If your a French shopkeeper you overcharge the occupying army and spend the rest of your days telling people how you faught for your country.
If your a French prostitute you surrender and give a social desease to the occupying force, thereby making you a "Hero and Freedom Fighter."
If your an everyday French citizen you vote in a communist regime and hope they surrender quickly.
If your a U. S. MARINE you kick back and wait for the order to come down to save the sorry French ASSHOLES again.
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