OK, So Here's The Deal...

A Marine Major, Running Fool, and All-Around Smart-Ass.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Clown Punching

I was listening to the radio this morning and it reminded me of this story.

I had a good friend while going through TBS in 1997 and we spent a lot of time together, mostly making fun of stuff. He told me some of his OCS stories and one involved being out in the woods during some miserable evolution. The Sergeant Instructor came around at night, shined the light in the faces of candidates in their sleeping bags, and yell "Hey, where are your hands? What are you doing? You punching the clown?"

Believe me, it was much funnier when he told it but that's not the important part of the story.

It was Halloween and I was bored. My buddy told me to come over later and we'd go out to Georgetown to watch all the crazies on the craziest of crazy nights.

In my barracks room, all I had was a radio to keep me company so I got intimately familiar with the local radio station, B101.5. I would always call in to answer some of their trivia questions. So I had an idea.

I called them up and started talking to the DJ, asking him if I could dedicate a song. The song was "Tears Of A Clown" by Smokey Robinson and gave him the following background story:

"A few years ago, I went to a Halloween party with my friend Leon and when we got there, we had a great time up until the time Leon got into a fight with another guest. The guy was dressed up as a clown so the sight of a vampire hooking and jabbing with a clown was beautiful. So if I could, this goes out to the most clown-punchinest guy I know, Jesus Leon."

The DJ told me offline that they were doing the Halloween theme so instead of "Tears Of A Clown" he was going with "Monster Mash." Oh well, the treasure was just putting my story over the waves and unknowingly helping me call Leon an Uber-masterbater to the greater Washington D.C. area.

I got ready and rushed over to Leon's apartment, knowing there would be a delay in airing the dedication. I darted into his apartment and made him turn on the radio without explanation. A few minutes later, we sat there in his apartment and heard the entire thing. Then laughed for 20 minutes.

Somewhere, I have a tape that has this. I set my radio on "record" before I left for his house.

Here's to you, Clown Puncher.

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